| The parrot sang Bob the Builder’s "Can we Fix it?" as Flower, Mer, Kitty and Cold discussed strategies. "What does it mean when it does that stupid song?" Mer demanded, fed up because the parrot had sung the song three times through now. "That we’re running low on brownies," Graehstone said quietly. "And we shall starve and be forced to survive off the parrot’s stock of sunflower seeds." "Hear that, people?" Flower called. "You’d better sort Mac out, or else no more brownies with ice cream until someone cleans the kitchen!" Everyone flinched. There were four layers of different mould on the kitchen surfaces. Phantom and Ornery were doing a scientific study of its effect on the moods of writers. The study had finished a year ago, but they were both too scared to try digging a knife into the six-inch layer of green mould. People began mumbling about what meals they could make of sunflower seeds. When someone suggested sunflower seed stew, they knew how desperate this was getting, not to mention ludicrous. Meanwhile, Mac was enjoying a feast of stolen brownies, little knowing that Phantom had also been playing around with adding mind control potion to the brownie mixture. But with no one to give her commands, she didn’t know this. JD sat in one of the cool carved-gold chairs, enjoying a brownie sundae too. "Good thing I have some clones. One of them was able to let me out of my secret lab. Good fella, JD19. I’ve given him a pay rise." "Does he know his expiry date is tomorrow?" Mac queried. JD shook his head. "He’ll find out when he starts melting." Shadow was just coming in, having finished making up her brownie sundae: brownies, ice cream, chocolate sauce, jelly, whipped cream and a cherry on top. "So what do you think the Realmians are doing?" she asked. Mac nodded, thinking of something. "Yeah, I’ll check on that." Taking a hand-sized computer from her pocket, she spoke into it. "Kamikaze squid llama 23, report." The squid llama reported with a "baa" and a spitting sound. Mac nodded. "Okay. Baa. Out." She snapped the computer closed and turned to them. "He says they’re all on the beach outside and are beginning to consider eating the parrot." She was right. "It is meat," Phantom said tentatively. "We remove the feathers..." Graeh agreed slowly. "Maybe stuff it with sunflower seeds..." The parrot squawked and began singing Evanescence’s "Bring Me To Life." "What does that mean?" Flower asked as she pondered on how much ketchup they had left in the realm’s larders. "It means..." Graeh tore his mind from how to best cook the parrot: fry or boil? "It means...a squid llama is spying on us from the rocks over there." He pointed. "Good," Mer said briskly. "Let’s eat it." "Or interrogate it," Flower said. "Interrogate it and find out where the rest of the squid llamas are, and eat those too," Cold agreed. "Interrogate it and just find out everything," Flower said. "Maybe we can eat the aliens too. I’ve always wondered what roast alien tastes like." They converged on the squid llama. It bleated in fright, staring up at them: it knew the rules: don’t expect mercy from a poet. | 
